My Autobiography: David Balleza K(C)atague: My Recurrent Dream and Its Interpretation

Wednesday, February 19, 2020

My Recurrent Dream and Its Interpretation

photo from briancollins.ca

Several years ago, I remember the following recurrent dream. The dream was so vivid and clear. I would have the same dream once every week so I was inspired to do some internet search of its meaning. But before I gave you my interpretation, here's my dream as I remembered it.

I was a teenager then and we lived in a farm house at the outskirts of my hometown in a 3rd class municipality in Barotac Viejo, Iloilo, Philippines ( the place where I grow up and went to high school). The farm house is a two-story house with a basement, 6 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms,and a banquet room (formal dining room). The decor were all antiques that my grandparents (my grandfather was a Spanish soldier and my grandmother was a Filipina) had collected during the Spanish colonization of the Philippines.

There was a grand piano in the living room with huge crystal chandelier that was imported from Spain. There is an underground passage in the basement that leads to the storage and Tool House. The house had a 10 acres of land with several outbuildings and a conference hall at the back, where my family held gatherings and parties for the community.

One day, we had a party for the community and my parents had invited about 300 guests. The farm house has a formal dining room that could accommodate around 20 guests in a sit down dinner, but since the number of guests will not fit inside the house, the party was held in the conference hall at the back of the property.

I was in the main house sleeping during this party and was awakened when one of the guest informed us that the conference hall was burning and told us to call the fire department. The fire department was late and we lost the whole conference Hall to the fire. Luckily all the guests were able to escape..

That's it, and I woke up angry that the hall was destroyed. (nothing sexy in this dream, although I have dreamed of many sexy things in the past). But my recurrent dream of this farm house that my parents and grandparents had resided and where I grew up always give me the chill. This dream is always clear and vivid in my mind. Sometimes it bothers me so I kept asking myself of the meaning of this dream.

Seven Common Dreams Theme

The following seven items appears to be the most common dreams theme.

1. Being chased– it may be interpreted as running away from problems. Interpretations would depend on who is chasing the dreamer which could give an idea of what the problem is.

2. Being naked as a jay bird– it apparently means you are trying to hide something; being naked without anyone noticing could signify that one is comfortable with himself.

3. Jumping or Falling from a building – it is interpreted that the dreamer has insecurities and anxieties. A dream where you are falling could mean that something is out of control in your life and you can’t stop it.

4. Flying or Parachuting– it could mean losing control or facing challenges you don’t feel you’re ready for.

5. Going to the Dentist and Teeth being pulled– It could mean that you feel your power being lessened or that you are not speaking your mind. It can also be related to one’s insecurities about his physical appearance and appeal to others.

6. Taking an examination or other tests – Taking an examination, not remembering that you have an exam, not being able to find your room for an exam, or a pen not working during an exam are interpreted as you feeling like you are being scrutinized for something.

7. Running – it may be a symbolism for having too much on your plate or that you’re trying to do a lot at the same time and can’t get ahead of anything.
Most of these dreams are related to the stress you are experiencing in your daily living and routine.

The following is an excerpt from the website, meaning of dreams.org in how to understand our dreams.

"Dreaming and sleeping are not mutually exclusive, so to embark on the journey of understanding why you dream and dream interpretation you must also explore the science or phenomena of sleep.

Everyone needs sleep and dreams, even if they're not always remembered, to function properly and successfully carry out daily tasks. When we do not sleep properly we become physically rundown and mentally incapable of coping with situations and problems favorably, lacking the means to flourish as a Human Being. If you go without sleep, depriving yourself of dreams, it soon becomes apparent that sleeping and dreaming are an essential part of being human.

It is widely believed that dreams are the mind's way of sorting through our waking thoughts, dealing with some of the harder to face issues in an abstract way that is less stressful and time-consuming than facing them while we are awake. After all, we would never get anything done if we spent all day worrying about our thoughts, relationships and childhood traumas. With this in mind, it is easy to see why we can breakdown mentally and physically without sleeping and dreaming",

My Own Interpretation of My Recurrent Dream

Using the three steps of interpreting my own dream as outlined in the article above, Here's my interpretation of my recurrent dream.

The old and big farm house of my dreams filled with antique furniture including a crystal chandelier in a big lot represent my dreams of building our own retirement home in the Philippines. The big party that was hosted by may late parents, represents all the wedding receptions and parties at our Conference Hall built after the construction of the main house.

Lastly, my dream of the burning building represent my fear of losing money in the small beach resort that we own in the compound of the Chateau Du Mer Resort in Boac, Marinduque, Philippines. I feel good analyzing my dream and its interpretation, thus for the last past ten years this recurrent dream had not happened.

How about you? Do you remember your dreams? Do you have recurring dreams? Could recurring dreams be linked to past lives?

Meanwhile, enjoy these photos, harvested from my garden

First Pineapple Harvest-Small but super Sweet

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Highlights of My Professional Career

In my more than 40 years of professional career, I have experienced both working rank and file, as well as supervising the work of subordinates. I have worked in four private firms and the Federal Government, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA), where I retired. I enjoyed the challenges and difficulties of both types of job situations. This is the highlights of my work experience story.

My first job after completing my doctorate degree was a Chemist for Chemagro Corporation in Kansas City, Missouri. It was a subsidiary of Bayer Corporation, a German conglomerate. I worked for the analytical chemistry department comprised of about fifty people; half that number was either chemists or biologists. My specific task was to develop analytical methods for the detection of pesticide residues in plant and animal tissues. I worked on my own, similar to six other bench chemists, and we all reported to the same supervisor.

The firm sponsored my visa conversion from a student to a permanent resident, and I was able to legally work and reside in the United States with my family. The company generously took care of its employees. At the end of each successful year, everyone received a 13th month salary bonus. The employees and their families celebrated wonderful annual Christmas parties in a downtown Kansas City hotel, with dancing and free drinks for the whole night.

Inasmuch as I enjoyed and loved working for Chemagro for five years, I found a new job which offered a substantially higher pay. Due to my exemplary work performance, my supervisor preferred and lobbied for me to stay with the company. I had to turn him down because they could not match the package presented by my new employer. It was also a chance for me and my family to move and live in the US west coast, where the mild winter climate is bearable compared to the Midwest.

My next job was at the agricultural research division of Shell Development Company in Modesto, California. I was a Research Chemist, and again I worked individually, same as five other chemists who all reported to a supervisor. My specific duty was similar to my previous job. I worked for them for five years, until the company decided to get out of the pesticide business. They closed their research facility affecting the jobs of more than 200 employees.

My third industrial job was with the agricultural research division of Stauffer chemical company, located in Richmond, California. I was a Senior Research Chemist doing the same project as my two previous jobs. I worked for twelve continuous years for the company, with outstanding annual job performance. I became a Principal Research Chemist, the highest attainable non-supervisory position.

One day in 1986, my supervisor informed me that my job had been eliminated, and I had one day to vacate the facility. It was the most dreadful lay off experience in my life. I felt anger, sadness and humiliation to be dismissed from work with one day notice, after all the years of hard work invested for the company. This was an unforgettable incident and was the gloomiest point in my professional career.
The company terminated sixty research employees, who were upset of the bad news.

One of the chemists was distressed and expressed his outrageous anger by threatening the company and its workers. He told his supervisor of his intention to bomb and burn down the laboratory. He was immediately escorted by the security staff out of the building and into his car. He was informed to leave behind his personal belongings; they will be mailed to his residence. He was warned never to show up again near the company premises or risk getting arrested.

My supervisor was kind and allowed me to take my time to pack up my belongings. It took me two days to clear up my workplace, after toiling for a long period in the same jobsite. We were provided clerical help and office space, in preparation to look for another job, such as updating our resumes, and using the computer and copy machine. We were given six weeks of separation pay plus benefits.

Fortunately, with the help of a friend who is a Church parishioner, I found another job thirty days after leaving Stauffer chemical company. He hired me as a senior research chemist and as a group leader with two technicians to supervise. It was in the same field as my expertise in my previous three jobs spanning the last twenty one years. My new employer was Chevron Chemical Company, and which was located in the same area as my former employer.

This job gave me the introduction and basic knowledge of managing the work of subordinates. I worked for Chevron Company for four and a half years. The company decided to consolidate their research facilities in Texas, and lay off all its research employees. This time I had enough distress and agony from working, and eventually getting laid off from several private companies. To avoid going through any more miserable layoffs, I made a vow that I would never again work for a private company.

In my work experiences, there were noticeable and unavoidable jobsite occurrences. One can never miss the office romantic relationships between co-workers, both illicit and permitted. Though it was frowned upon, there was a boss and staff relationship, which was used as a ploy to get ahead in the company. Some relationships had chemistry, no pun intended, but some never worked out. Oftentimes, there was a sense of distrust among bench chemists for some workers who unjustly obtained preferred work assignments.

Some employees resorted to bribing superiors to get special privileges, such as being able to attend choice conferences and meetings in exciting venues or locations. Likewise, politics was always present at the worksites. It was during an era when various forms of harassment, equal opportunity and discrimination laws were not yet enforced in the workplace. Occasionally, an unexpected chemical explosion happens in a laboratory setting, where luckily no one got seriously hurt.

In the three private companies I worked for, I was able to publish scientific journals for some of the research studies and analytical methods which I developed for the respective companies of Chemagro, Shell Development and Stauffer.

After deciding and making a vow to avoid working in the private sector, I made my new goal which was either to work for the state of California, or the Federal government in Washington, D.C. Four months after I lost my job in Chevron, I was lucky and joyful to be hired by the Food and Drug Administration as a review chemist in the fall of 1990.

In 1994 I was promoted as an Expert Research Chemist with a GS-14 rating. My expertise was on Anti-malarial and Anti-parasitic drug products. In 1997, I was again deservingly promoted to Chemistry team leader, supervising the work of six Chemistry reviewers including five with doctorate degrees.

As team leader, I was responsible for prioritizing, assigning, and assuring the technical accuracy of all chemistry, manufacturing and control issues for all new drug applications submitted to the Division of Anti-Infective Drug Products, Center of New Drugs.

It was part of my responsibility to give advice, instruct and promote high morale and teamwork in my group. My work in the FDA is confidential, until the drug patent on the products I worked on has expired. There are manufacturing supplements that I have approved that are now open for the public in the Internet.

In 1998, I won the Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) Award. The citation reads, “For outstanding accomplishments in fostering the objectives of the EEO Program by hiring minorities and encouraging their professional growth while providing excellent leadership.” I have received numerous certificates of appreciation, awards in leadership and communications, commendation for teamwork and excellence in the accomplishment of the FDA mission. I have also received several letters of appreciation from private industry for my review work.

There are many good things working as rank and file while enjoying doing one’s job individually. It is a humbling, satisfying and productive experience, if one can work in harmony with one’s immediate supervisor. Working individually develops one’s skills in goal setting and scheduling. But in general, the financial rewards are less than a person who has supervisory responsibilities.

Managing the work of others has its challenges. Moreover, it develops one’s skill in handling and developing people, and the compensation rewards and benefits are better. Due to additional duties, responsibilities and leadership, supervisory work can be more stressful than working as a subordinate. However, supervisory jobs give one more personal growth and satisfaction, based on my personal experience. My work in FDA as a team leader managing the work of six scientists had been the happiest and rewarding work experience in my career in Chemistry. You might also like:

Wednesday, February 19, 2020

My Recurrent Dream and Its Interpretation

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